character and personality
oh that's interesting! lexicographers have them as synonyms! how funny! and how revealing! it probably means that for the most time, we treat them as equivalent also. and yet we know - don't we? - that they're different. character is the collection of qualities we chose to adhere to for life. we might be honest, for instance, but of an honesty you can count on for life. that's part of our character. but we might be friendly sometimes too, at which times we know how to do small talk, and we know certain social games, certain social skills, we can set a stranger at ease, we can even make a stranger feel welcomed and accepted. but suppose we are also a security officer at work. in that role, "friendly" is not appropriate, and we are not. "deadly serious" is appropriate, and we take that on. my point is that there are attributes and qualities that we put on and take off as easily as we might a sport coat or a jacket, and there are some that stick to us throughout what we do, that we could no more put aside than we can put aside our blood vessels. the latter attributes and qualities are character, and the former are personalities, and yes, everyone has personalities. who you are at a party is not who you are at a funeral. who you are at a formal inquiry is not who you are at a celebration. who you are for your kid's birthday is not who you are fishing with your buddies. those are all "real you"s, but they are temporary "real you"s, rented, so to speak, for the occasion. at your core, though, you are someone who persists, whatever personality you put on for the occasion, and that persistent you is your character. yes, having these distinctions is worthwhile, and yes, I appreciate them.
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