Sunday, July 31, 2016

213.366 - 2016 project and magical beings

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph, or a poem that appreciates

magical beings

what?  you might say.  didn't you study physics?  didn't you study engineering?  shouldn't your mind be a cold, hard fact machine?  yes, yes, and yes.  and yet.  I also read all the Conan books by Robert Howard.  I read almost all of the Poul Anderson books.  I studied science and engineering, but I love magic - up to a point.  in my stories, you encounter fairies, elves, trolls, a fire elf, gryphons, lions that speak, a flying lion with a sense of honor, two kinds of demons, wind spites (no I didn't misspell that), a dwarf, many magical swords, a spider-woman, a gun that turns into a laser device, another that shoots lightning in the appropriate circumstances.  mostly though you encounter human beings, caught up in awfulnesses that they or other human beings created.  but the magic you encounter in my stories is limited.  a magician can raise a local storm, but it blows itself out in minutes.  a wind spite can make the wind throw a tantrum that will knock over a Harley, but she cannot conjure a hurricane.  a mermaid can heal a human who should have drowned, the granddaughter of a river can keep a boy from drowning and talk her grandmother into keeping him from dying when his lung is punctured by an arrow.  but the river cannot rid humanity of slavers.  and she cannot flood surgically.  a flood is a flood.  the queen of dreams can let a man sleep with one of her four hundred daughters, but she cannot make her daughter stop loving him.  none of my magical swords shoots bullets.  I do not know why, but having magical powers is important, and having limitations is just as important.  I respect my magical beings, and they respect my stories.

Saturday, July 30, 2016

212.366 - 2016 project and capguns

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

capguns

so much depends on a well-working body!  this body hasn't worked well since it developed congestive heart failure (28 August 2012).  of course, I've also had something to do with that.  I dropped my Harley on my left leg twice in one year (October 2012 and August 2013) and shattered both bones in my lower left leg the second time.  I've never walked quite right since then, which led to peculiar aches, pains, owies, hurts, and so forth.  I don't know that this bilateral sinus tarsi syndrome is part of that not walking quite right, but it fits.  what, you might ask, has any of this to do with capguns?  and maybe it doesn't.  you see, up til CHF, I had a good (I say it was good) habit of going to the firing range and shooting thirty rounds of ammunition at a target, then coming home and cleaning my gun.  I haven't done that since.  wait, I think that isn't true.  I think I did it a few weeks between CHF and shattering my leg bones, but I certainly have not since I broke my leg.  you see, there's a certain amount of walking required to get to the gun range, and it was avoidable.  I could do it later.  whenever the hell later comes along.  so I haven't shot my real gun in three years.  damn!  but cap guns?  yes, I have capguns too, a matched pair of six-shooters.  they are designed for a first-grader's hand, so I can just barely hold or shoot them.  but I did, back before 9/11/2001.  I helped people celebrate July the Fourth and Halloween and Veteran's day and New Year's day with my capguns for years.  Halloween?  yes, Halloween.  I was a cowboy on Halloween, of course.  but people kind of lost their sense of humor about guns and things like guns after 9/11.  so I don't use my capguns any more, but now and then when I'm looking for something else entirely, my capguns float up to the top of the heap, and I hold one in each hand and go through the motions of shooting each.  yes, I still appreciate capguns.  and I have to admire what happened to capguns between 1954 and 2000.  when I was dumped in this country in about 1954, capguns were white and chrome and shiny and silly.  the trigger and the hammer worked - that's all you needed to work to pop the caps.  boys didn't care.  they looked like the guns on Saturday afternoon shoot'm-ups and made a shooting noise.  yea!  by the late 1990s, when I got my matched pair, they were black and looked like real guns, only squinched down to the size of a kid's hand.  the cylinders turned like a real six-shooter's.  and on mine, you loaded the caps inside little fake shells, put the little fake shells inside the chambers in the cylinder, then shot your caps and had to reload, first the little shells, then the cylinder.  I loved those little guns!  still do.  still love my real gun for that matter.  but capguns!  what a kick!

Friday, July 29, 2016

211.366 - 2016 project and tools

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

tools

when I was a little boy, the world was weird.  we were foreigners and everyone else were natives.  my parents thought they were, well, superior to everyone else, but everyone else could do something.  now understand, my father could preach, but hell, I could preach, and it only made sense that if I could, anyone could.  my mother could manage a household with two servants who did all the work.  she made it look so natural that I thought my little sister probably could, and if she could, then surely any woman could.  sorry, but that's how the world looked to me as a little boy.  but then there were tools.  tools puzzled me.  I wasn't supposed to touch them, but they just begged to be touched.  no, they craved to be used.  but dear god, not by my father, please.  when my father hammered, he soon smashed a thumb or a finger, or maybe a plate that wasn't even close to the nail he allegedly meant to drive.  if he tried to unscrew something, he destroyed the screw-head, and had no back-out to get the screw out once he'd destroyed the screw-head.  I am, of course, unfair to my father.  surely he drove a nail once, maybe even often, without hurting himself or breaking something nearby.  surely he used a screwdriver once to remove a screw or to insert a screw and it just worked without any drama, but that's not how I remember him and tools.  for him, a saw wandered away from the line and somehow produced a crooked end.  a plane made a lumpy surface.  for my father, a tool was to hang on a wall and leave alone.  which was just as well, since he was gone most of the time.  what's more useless than a handyman who isn't handy?  but early on, I discovered that I could too climb up and fetch a tool, climb down and use it, then put it back as if it had hung in place all the time.  I learned to hammer a nail straight and flush with the surface.  screwdrivers let me disassemble and re-assemble many things, and the hell that broke loose when I had parts left over made me learn to remember how they came apart so I could put them back together right.  I thought a plane was magnificent!  ooooo!  and chisels were divine.  for a long time wrenches baffled me.  for one thing, they were too heavy.  even when I got strong enough, all I could see to do with them was to destroy wood.  oh!  but then I saw a plumber work with them, and several mysteries were solved at once.  on one of my walks home from school, I watched a welder work, and decided I was going to grow up and be a welder!  what he did was as close to magic as anything I'd ever watched!  when we were in this country that terrible year in which I learned about school and how strangers who weren't natives behaved, my granddaddy - the good grandfather - gave me a set of tools and my own toolbox.  it was metal and you could cut yourself on it!  it!  it had a hammer that really hammered, a saw that really sawed, four different-sized screwdrivers, a level, an L-shaped ruler.  that was probably all.  he told me that "later" we would add wrenches, and planes, and chisels, but these would do while I was learning.  yes, when I got older enough, maybe I could get a welder's tools too.  maybe.  he showed me how to use each of the tools in my toolkit, but then he brought out the real magic.  he'd bought me three books that showed how real tools, man-sized tools, were used, really used.  every page had two, three, or four drawings, and dozens of words.  and not a damned page said "Run, Dick, run."  he was wonderful.  the books were wonderful.  but most of all, tools were wonderful.  still are.

Thursday, July 28, 2016

210.366 - 2016 project and three astounding black women poets

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

three astounding black women poets

sigh.  when I was beginning my journey to poet, way back in 1968, a horrible year, the white man who advised me made me aware of LeRoi Jones.  now in his defense, he didn't know poetry, he didn't know American poetry, he didn't know American poets, and he knew just barely more than I did.  his specialty was literature by white men (he didn't know he'd made that limitation) in the nineteenth century.  he and I were such good examples of white privilege.  we bathed in it, we basked in it, we basted in it, we simmered in it, we stewed in it, we sauteed in it, and we were oblivious to it.  sigh.  but he did know about LeRoi Jones, told me to find and buy a book of his.  damn he was good!  the professor who inadvertently gave me good advice, and LeRoi Jones, the poet.  both hes.  but white privilege is like an insulating blanket, and male privilege doubles the insulation.  when I say I studied poetry, mainly what that means is that I read poetry like I had read science fiction when I was a teenager.  oh, I read textbooks about poetry, but they were mostly a waste of time.  but I read the classic poets, and I read poets of the twentieth century, beat poets, confessional poets, imagist poets, minimalist poets, modern poets.  somehow in that reading, a crack in my privilege developed and let me discover women poets.  I was floored.  women had been every kind of poet in the twentieth century, still lived, and still wrote poetry that awed me.  wake up call?  sorta, but I heard it faintly, through yards of insulation.  sometime in that process, I also learned that LeRoi Jones had reinvented himself as Amiri Baraka, and I bought a second book of his and was awed by poems in it.  sigh.  did that wake me up?  no, it would be another ten years and another book by Amiri Baraka for me to learn that all along the twentieth century almost a parallel river of black poets had been writing poems in an English that was nothing like mine, and sometimes was exactly like mine, but their experiences of life in America were nothing like mine and were sometimes exactly like mine.  to borrow a line from Hiram Sims, "I was confused."  meanwhile, someone mentioned Maya Angelou, and Lindy bought a book of hers, then another, and another, and I began to read them and was amazed.  and then I met Conney Williams, and he insisted that I participate in the Anansi Workshop, and I did, and was a little more humbled.  damned good poets, damned good poems, and I was completely unaware of them until Anansi.  I think Conney bought the collected poems of Lucille Clifton, and read two or three to me.  So I bought that book and began working my way through it.  then Wanda Coleman died and I finally learned about her.  dear gods of poetry!  how could I have kept them - Maya Angelou, Lucille Clifton, and Wanda Coleman - a secret from myself?  but it was worse than that.  I have here - I just laid my left hand on a stack of books - nine books by poets who are black women, and I know at least nine other poets who are black women, and I'm still ignorant.  what I mean is that black women have written an awful lot of poems and I have read a few of them, I have heard a few others.  my cave now has two rivers rushing through it, and I'm not only aware of poems by women who are black, but I'm especially aware of poems by Maya Angelou, Lucille Clifton, and Wanda Coleman.  and these other nine women.  I will be studying poetry the rest of my life.

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

209.366 - 2016 project and the Mongols, the Tartars, and the Huns

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or  a poem that appreciates

the Mongols, the Tartars, and the Huns

once upon a time, maybe as long ago as when I started school - remember, I could already read well enough that I was fighting my way through the Book of Knowledge's article on government and asking my granddaddy (the only grown man I knew who gave thoughtful answers to a little boy's questions) what the tough words meant - I became an admirer of civilization.  I soon knew about the civilizations of the Middle East, of Greece (which should have been of Minoa, I think), and later, of Europe.  sigh.  by then, about the time I was twelve and unceremoniously yanked outa Brasil and dumped in this country, I was bored with civilizations.  for a while - a few months - European civilization appealed.  all those knights, riding around independently, fighting each other for no reason at all, or over a lady's kerchief, seemed wonderful, but my history books convinced me those were just romantic stories, that European civilization was just another way grownups had invented to be boring.  (I didn't yet understand that the alternative to boring was cannibalistic.)  so I was delighted when the Huns rode into my history books.  yes!  chaos and rage!  my kind of people!  what?  they were defeated?  by a girl?  what the hell kind of world was this?  oh well, before long, I read about the Tartars, and my hopes climbed again.  nope, the sheer inertia of all that civilization wore them down and swallowed them.  oh!  but maybe the Mongols would be different!  they swept out of some podunk little place north of China and east of Russia, took over huge chunks of both of those, swarmed down into India, across to Persia, and had both Romes trembling, and then slowly got bogged down in civilization again!  it was like a quicksand of the soul!  but oh, the glory of taking it on for a while!  and the inventiveness of each of those peoples!  particularly the Mongols.  the stirrup!  what a delightful idea!  soldiers had been falling out of saddles for centuries before the Mongols brought them the stirrup!  the recurved bow!  it was so complicated to make that no one else really picked it up, but it meant a Mongol never had to fight a knight.  a Mongol just rode around him and shot arrows through his armor.  oh man!  oh man!  I was so tickled by the Huns and the Tartars and the Mongols that even after they let me down, I basked in the threat of them.  damn!  go Huns!  go Tartars!  go Mongols!  and they had.  they went as far as they could.  but eventually the wall of marshmallows won.  damn!  damn!  damn!

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

208.366 - 2016 project and English queens who ruled

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

English queens who ruled

English kings were a randy lot.  there have been many more English queens than English kings.  but England, like the U.S., is part of the great patriarchy, so in many cases we know next to nothing about the queens.  even their extraordinary queens are left with a list of accomplishments, but no record of what they said or what they thought.  it's just not our way.  (in Egypt, there was one female Pharaoh in a string of hundreds of Pharaohs; after her death, her son went back and tried to chisel her out of the record of Pharaohs.  that's the patriarchy.)  nevertheless, we know that England has been ruled by eight different women.  (I will list them; see below.)  some have been outstanding; one was queen for nine days; one was a little crazy about morality, or at least about seeming to be moral; one was probably England's greatest ruler; and most I know less about than I'd like to.  still, I appreciate them, an outstanding collection of women who managed to get around England's commitment to the patriarchy.  brava for each of them!

     queen         born-died     reigned
     Matilda       1102-1167     1141
     Jane Grey     1537-1554     1553  the nine-day queen
     Mary I        1516-1558     1553-1558
     Elizabeth I   1533-1603     1558-1603
     Mary II       1662-1694     1689-1694
     Anne          1665-1714     1707-1714
     Victoria      1819-1901     1837-1901
     Elizabeth II  1926-         1952-

Monday, July 25, 2016

207.366 - 2016 project and the English kings

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

the English kings

hm.  how to say this.  I have liked individual Englishmen and Englishwomen, but I do not like the English.  when someone says "the English", I think of the redcoats enforcing English laws on colonials in our thirteen colonies, I think of the English Army enforcing English laws in Ireland for nearly a thousand years, I think of the English Army in India, or China.  I do not like the English.  but I know that's silly.  American history doesn't really start with the first European footprint in Virginia, it starts with all the arrogance and righteousness stuffed into that boot.  whoever that invader was, he brought with him all of English history and lore and customs and expectations.  they're what started American history.  that's why we can teach kids, "first there was the Middle East, where we invented civilization, then there was Greece, where we invented democracy, then there was Rome, where we invented law'n'order, then there was England where we almost got the mix right, then there was the United States, where we invented the perfect country and perfect human beings to go with it."  At least that's how I remember history in American public schools.  Anyway, since I grew up a little bit of a skeptic and a little bit of a romantic despite what I was supposed to learn, I managed to not like the English, but admire their kings!  so I read biographies of the English kings in order starting with Alfred the Great until I got to Richard II and could find no biography of him.  (in the public library, I mean.  I didn't think of buying my own.)  it was a fun project, and I learned to appreciate them even more than I had.  they often were romantic characters, ruling as well or as poorly as they did, leading their own armies, first as princes, then as kings.  some of them probably were a little crazy, others a little daft, but many actually did have a vision for England and later for the United Kingdom, and those who did worked to bring their visions into existence.  many made the transition from general to king well.  given that there was no school for that, hurray!  maybe someday I'll go back and finish that project.  if I do, I wonder what I'll think of the modern kings, including the queens.  maybe we shall see.  meanwhile, hail, kings!   what an interesting bunch you were!

Sunday, July 24, 2016

206.366 - 2016 project and venues

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

venues

specifically venues for poetry readings.  but I suppose first I should define venue, since it and venues are used mysteriously in sentences people speak.  (you're gonna love it!  at least I love definitions that are this simple.)  a venue is a place where something happens, especially an organized event like a concert, a conference, or a sports event.  It also can be the county or district within which a criminal or civil case must be heard.  for this appreciation, I'm going to ignore the second meaning, and specify the organized event as a poetry reading or an open mic.  in particular, a place where a poetry reading or an open mic happens that charges no rent.  "what?" you may say, but yes, many places (or their owners) charge no rent for poetry readings or for open mics.  amazing!  generous!  thank you!  places like Beyond Baroque, like the Avenue 50 Studio in Highland Park, like branches of the Los Angeles Public Library, like the United States Veterans' Artists Alliance in Culver City, like certain restaurants and bars in the greater Los Angeles area.  to all of you, thank you.

Saturday, July 23, 2016

205.366 - 2016 project and elves

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

elves

if you grew up in the United States of America, then you probably think elves are those cartoonish little fools who serve Santa Claus on Christmas cards.  no wonder real elves avoid us!  elves, fairies, and humans are more or less of a height.  elves and fairies, on average, are a little taller, a little more slender than humans. but not so much!  heavens!  we've fought wars against each other and alongside each other, so it's not as if they were wispy!  to be clear, they fought with and against the Norsemen, so they definitely have some mass to go along with their height.  but elves.  they can be strong allies, they can be implacable foes.  for a century or more, we thought them incapable of emotion.  we ignore a lot of evidence.  ah!  but of course!  it would have come from women or elf women.  we wouldn't have known about that evidence.  no one thought to ask.  you see, elves, fairies, and humans can, as we prudishly used to say, intermarry.  but it is more than that.  there are two proverbs, but I remember neither.  the gist of them is that once a man has experienced sex with an elf or with a fairy, he is ruined for human women.  it may also be true of women and male elves or fairies.  but that's just the sex of it.  women who have been married to an elf, so I am told, almost cannot be seduced by a human man, nothing he has to say or offer compares to what she experienced, what she now needs.  one can interpret that, I think, that elves express emotion quite satisfactorily.  on the other side, human males married to an elf woman are intensely loyal.  allegedly not even a different elf can make them stray.  I interpret that as not only is the sex great, but whatever else is expressed is magnificent.  a biologist claims it is just pheromones, but in his view so is what humans call love between themselves.  and we do know that when Henry V died, he of Agincourt, a detachment of elves marched in the funeral, and were observed to weep when he was interred.  so much for emotionless.  you can tell that I appreciate elves in history and in lore and legend, but what about real elves now?  I understand that elves and fairies began to avoid us humans when we went mad with our religions, around the time of Henry V for that matter.  Oops, no!  That wasn't when, was it?  It was about three hundred years earlier, about the time of Richard I and John, wasn't it?  I further understand that the stories of the Grimms and other collectors brought a surge in visits from fairies and elves, but they quickly learned that we were still insane about magic and re-exiled themselves.  some say that now that we are appeased by science, a few fairies and elves have returned and live safely among us.  the same some say that most infiltrators live as mates to safely human spouses.  they also say that elves and fairies still hope someday we can fight and love and visit together like we once did before we went religion-mad.  we shall see.

Friday, July 22, 2016

204.366 - 2016 project and chromebook

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

chromebook

unless you really like different kinds of computers, you may not know what a chromebook is.  it's a laptop that doesn't need much storage (storage is your disk or whatever you use to save your data and programs and work on) because it uses the cloud.  yes, you can reserve your own little turf in the cloud - your "little turf" usually winds up being bigger than a typical hard drive (disk) - and save your data and programs and work there.  some people use that "turf" for backups only.  some people use it as working space.  with a chromebook it basically replaces your disk.  "oh no!" says a friend of mine.  "trust the cloud?  what if it rains?"  yeah, yeah.  so the chromebook assumes an internet connection, a fast one.  you don't want to spend all your time waiting for bits to flow to or from the cloud.  I think a chromebook is a fine idea.  I'd like to see it work.  right now, it sorta does.  I do not have access to my "little turf" except from my chromebook, which makes sharing a file or transferring my work to a different computer (remember I use seven) difficult.  so far, using Dropbox is more convenient.  Dropbox doesn't care whether I access a file from an Apple computer or a PC.  it just lets me work on the file, then save it.  Dropbox is very convenient.  in my ideal world - I don't get there very often - my chromebook would work the same way.  in my ideal world, I can do an hour's work on my chromebook, and half a day later, if I have an idea while I'm working on my Mac or on my Surface Pro 3, I can just add that idea to the chromebook file and keep on doing what I'm doing on the Mac or the PC.  maybe someday chromebooks will work that way.  right now the makers assume you will work either on the chromebook - and you can - or not on the chromebook.  hmpf.  still, I like the idea of the chromebook and continue to experiment with it.  I'm betting that someday the chromebook people will get less proprietary about my "little turf" and my complaint about it will go away.  and yes, I do trust the cloud.  and no, I don't expect rain from it.

Thursday, July 21, 2016

203.366 - 2016 project and browsers

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

browsers

once upon a time, the world was dark.  the internet had been invented, used by colleges and universities to exchange data and peer-reviewed articles, and mainly for military-related purposes.  then mysteriously, the internet was opened to the public, and internet access providers took over, but didn't do much other than sell access to the internet.  but some programmers off in some research institute, if I remember correctly, had a much more exciting idea for the internet.  they created a new kind of program they called a browser.  before the browser, a good website looked like a collection of typewritten pages, and that was wonderful.  if you knew the right URLs, you could read about oil exploration in the Sudan, or physics experiments in Antarctica, or the latest scandals in hockey.  browsers transformed the internet.  you could receive and see pictures!  within minutes, it seemed like, you could receive and see animations.  videos became available.  streaming fonts.  suddenly the internet was exciting, and people kept finding ways to make it more exciting, and some of us old fuddy-duddies were left behind, still learning how to make text flow around a picture.  or how to make a webpage show up on screens of different resolutions.  despite us old fuddy-duddies, browsers transformed the internet from images of typewritten pages to what we know today.  Viva browsers!  Bravo browser programmers!  thank you for bringing electricity to a cave-dweller's world!

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

202.366 - 2016 project and email

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

email

email!  for heaven's sake, email!  before email, I was a miserable correspondent.  I don't mean I went out on the misery battlefields and sent back articles and columns about how we were coping.  no, you would send me a handwritten letter, probably in cursive (for those of you who don't remember, cursive doesn't mean a string of foul words, it means the handwriting in loops, arcs, straight lines, and dots in which all the letters in a word are connected), and I would be so pleased I'd probably read it twice, then set it down in a stack of other letters I needed to answer, and have such good intentions of answering you right away!  and then one day I'd have an oh-my-god and for a day or two or three, I'd write and write and write, probably in cursive, until I almost cleared that stack of letters to answer.  heaven help you if yours was the letter on the bottom.  it might take a year for me to get to it.  and then I'd have to start a new stack.  and then someone invented email.  no, email was invented at about the same time as the internet.  I didn't discover the internet until about 1994, and that discovery may have caused the Northridge earthquake.  and soon after I learned about email, and started using it to communicate with all four people I knew who also used email.  the internet was a different world then.  eventually almost everyone I knew communicated by email, and I'm usually much better about answering emails right away.  it is true that I sometimes get behind, and we have to wait til I get another oh-my-god and mostly catch up with all my emails.  if I've owed you an email for more than six weeks, you probably should send it to me again.  I've probably lost it.  a stack of emails is not as much clutter as a stack of letters was.  it doesn't nag as well.  but damn, email is convenient in so many ways!  so convenient that occasionally I have to get out a piece of paper and a writing implement (a pencil or a pen, preferably not a ballpoint that skips and stutters and clots and plops) and practice cursive again until I'm pretty sure someone else could read it.  praise email!  thank you whoever invented it!  and thank you all the programmers who have since made emailers so straightforward and elegant!  I love email!

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

201.366 - 2016 project and Google

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

Google

bless Google!  you may not remember our own Dark Ages, the internet when it was still new and a browser was a new thing.  we found our way around it like cave dwellers with torches or just feeling our way along the walls.  we hoarded URLs that worked.  kind webmasters provided URLs to related websites.  a friend might email you an URL he or she had found.  and then!  out of the darkness they came.  search engines!  oh my goodness!  you typed in a few keywords for what you wanted, and behold!  the search engine began listing URLS that might have something to do with the keywords you'd entered.  they were mysterious and wonderful, and you often found yourself on a mystery ride.  some websites you went to gave you just what you wanted, some gave you nonsense but nonsense related to your keywords, and some websites on the list had, as far as you could tell, nothing at all to do with your keywords.  among those first search engines, Google soon distinguished itself for me.  it had a cute interface, as if it recognized that we played a game - a game without rules, but one in which winning counted a lot.  it returned the list quickly.  the list seemed to be well-organized, the ones most likely to fit your keywords at the top.  the surprises it brought you were often fun, like learning a new synonym for one of your keywords.  Google soon became my favorite search engine and remains so today.  thank you, wizards who put it together, and wizards who still make it work better now.  bless Google!

Monday, July 18, 2016

200.366 - 2016 project and DoY 200

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

DoY 200

c'mon!  wouldn't you think there'd be some signpost?  some milestone?  some alignment of astronomical objects?  some way the universe celebrated our reaching the 200th day, Day of the Year 200, since we started this trip around the sun?  well, there isn't.  nope, nuthin!    you and I can say, "hurray!  yippee!  huzzah!" as quietly or as loudly as we wish, and probably no one will join in with us.  if we're lucky, someone will give us a quizzical grin.  if we're unlucky, some cop will draw his "baton" and walk over to us and "suggest" we move along.  yes, DoY 200 looks like it oughtabe special, but neither the universe nor human society commemorates it.  but what the heck, happy DoY 200 to you!

Sunday, July 17, 2016

199.366 - 2016 project and my PDA

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

PDA

oh my goodness!  PDA means so many things now!  (I looked it up in Google.)  Back when I learned the acronym, it meant Personal Data Assistant.  No, it wasn't a person.  it was a small (shirt pocket sized) electronic device that could sync with my desktop computer and could receive text messages.  gosh, it almost seems quaint now!  it held my schedule, my to-do list, folders and files of things I might need to look up while away from work or home, and maybe a few other things.  in years that seem like minutes looking back at them now, my PDA became your smart phone (I still think of mine as a PDA) with a phone that's so convenient it's all but replaced the landline phone, internet access (a browser), email, texting, weather, GPS paired with a mapping service, word processing, spreadsheets, heck, even presentation preparation, and I can't even remember what else.  there in your hand or pocket is a computer more powerful that the first dozen or so computers I worked on!  some people can even program on one!  sheesh!  I use mine for so many things, I begin to think I'm a skilled user.  I do.  until I look up from mine and say to Lindy, "I wish my PDA could do X."  almost invariably her answer is "here!  let me show you."  from hers, she maintains her website!  geeminey!  but this isn't an appreciation of Lindy and her smart phone, although maybe it should be, this is an appreciation of my smart phone.  yes, I use it for a game too.  yes, a game. freecell solitaire.  and I can do elementary calculations, about what a skilled abacus user could do without electronics.  yes, there's an app for much more complicated calculations, but I've lost track of what they mean. my PDA does almost everything I want it to, and probably does the rest if I'd just learn how.  and it can do about a thousand times more that what I've ever asked of one.  I am in awe, and grateful.

Saturday, July 16, 2016

198.366 - 2016 project and my iPad

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

iPad

oh my goodness yes!.  someday, I promise myself, someday I'll learn how to really use the iPad.  after using the iPad for seven years, that promise looks a little thin and tattered.  I'm still a doofus.  I do the few things I know reasonably well.  but this isn't an appreciation of me, it's an appreciation of an artifact, a tool, of a design done right, an iPad.  there were tablets before the iPad, and they were okay, they worked well.  then Apple stepped in with the iPad, and we knew how a tablet computer was supposed to work, like the iPad.  and for the few things I wanted to do with it, the iPad works almost intuitively.  it's like an extension of my hand, and I figured out how to use my hand as a baby.  go ahead, feel superior, I don't mind.  I store my poems on my iPad, then use it to pick out the ones I want for a reading, copy them into a folder I set up for that reading, then order them the way I want to read them.  my iPad is light enough to hold while I present my poems without getting the shakes, and it never loses track of where my poems are.  so far, my iPad and I do this comfortably.  I also take notes on it, in workshops and classes.  if I need it for a calculation, I can do that.  if I need it to find out where in the world I am, it'll do that.  And there are many, many more things it can allegedly do, maybe a bazillion, but I haven't figured out how.  I know people program on it.  not me.  I am told people do astronomical calculations on it.  not me.  it does what I got it for and maybe half a dozen other things I've tried.  yea iPad!  and thank you, Apple.

Friday, July 15, 2016

197.366 - 2016 project and northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part eight

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part eight

ah!  I think this concludes this sequence of appreciations.  if not, I'll come back to it.  please remember the caveats for this sequence:  1945-1954 is once upon a time, and these appreciations depend on memories of a boy between two-and-a-half years old and about twelve years old, remembered by a seventy-four-year-old man.  this particular appreciation and set of memories goes back before the blue-grey house.  I think I was about nine, so this would have happened in 1951.  it happened at the plain house.  plain?  yes, there was absolutely nothing special about it.  it looked like what a kid draws for a house.  it had a carport.  why?  my father had access to a car sometimes, for his travels.  I don't think he owned it.  the car disappeared when he bought the blue-grey house.  but the carport isn't important to this appreciation, this memory.  no, another attachment to the house is.  out in back of the house was a clothes washing stand.  it had a little dais, a little cement stoop, not much wider than the length of my feet.  I suspect it was all cement, not concrete.  it was about the size of a washing machine, except no one knew washing machines then.  it had a deep sink for plunging the clothes into sudsy water, then for rising them in later.  it had a built-in washboard for rubbing the clothes on.  I don't remember why clothes were rubbed on a washboard, maybe to get out the ground-in dirt for kids' clothes, maybe to break up and wash out the starch from  my father's dress shirts.  yes, under his wool suits in the tropics, he wore dress shirts so starched and ironed I was sure he risked cutting his throat on them.  I don't remember watching one of the servants washing clothes in that device, but I'm pretty sure they did.  we had clotheslines, and I remember the sheets billowing in the breeze, and the shirts, blouses, dresses and underwear dancing in the wind.  but most of the time, the wash stand stood around empty and unused.  except when I climbed on it.  but climbing on it wasn't very interesting.  after the first time or two, it was kinda boring.  until!  I read about Tarzan in a book with drawings.  in one of the drawings, swung from one tree to another on vines.  hm.  we didn't have a jungle, we didn't have trees, we didn't have a tree.  we had clotheslines, but they wouldn't work!  oh!  I could tie a rope to the little roof-like structure that shaded the wash stand, stand on the wash stand, and swing out and drop onto the ground.  it seemed like a great idea, except I had no rope.  I looked and I looked and I looked everywhere I could think of, but I could find no rope.  hm.  but I had a ball of string, bits and lengths of string I had found here and there and collected.  now I had a use for it.  no, I couldn't swing on string, obviously.  if I could break string by snapping it between my hands, and I could, then it wasn't strong enough to hold me up.  hm.  but I had recently learned about braiding so I made a braid of three strings.  hm.  *that* wasn't going to hold me up either.so I made two more braids of string and braided them.  hm, not much better.  so I made braids and braids and braids of string, and I made braids of braids of string, then I made braids of braids of string, and I made a braid of braids of braids of string.  there!  that looked and felt thick enough.  surely it would hold me up!  I took it outside, climbed up on the wash stand, stood up and tied it to the little roof-like structure that shaded the wash stand,  hm.  that took more of my "rope" than I'd expected.  rats!  but I still had enough to swing out past the stoop and drop to the ground, at least it looked like I did when I swung my rope out with nothing attached to it.  well, it looked kinda like Tarzan's vine.  So I grabbed my rope and jumped!  and heard and felt the rope snap.  and turned a half-somersault and landed on my head on the edge of the stoop.  oh my!  I lay on the ground by the stoop and steadfastly did not cry.  this would not do!  I couldn't be found lying on the ground next to the stoop.  I sat up.  no, that wasn't any better.  uh-oh!  I'd broken a sliver off the edge of the stoop!  damn.  I could think of no way to hide that, but I did climb back up on the wash stand  and untie my rope from the little roof-like structure. then hide the pieces of the rope under my bed, then lie down in my bed until I was no longer dizzy and my head didn't hurt.  uh-oh.  I overheard the two servants talking about the sliver broken off the edge of the stoop.  they couldn't figure out how I had done it, but were pretty sure I must've.  but they didn't tell my mother, so I more or less got away with it.  that's kinda magical, isn't it?

Thursday, July 14, 2016

196.366 - 2016 project and northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part seven

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part seven

sigh!  I never would have thought I had so much to appreciate here when I started this sequence.  (remember the caveats:  1945-1954 is once upon a time, and these come from the memories of a boy two-and-a-half years old to twelve years old, remembered by a seventy-four-year-old man.)  I think we get to finish today with two incidents, one at the blue-grey house, and one before it.  they may be funny to you, they may horrify you.  be prepared.  I think I have told you about the nice neighbor who showed movies every Saturday night, or every Sunday night.  so by roughly 1954, I had seen more movies than I knew existed before 1952.  Do you remember movies before 1954?  everybody smokes.  it was weird.  in my everyday experience, nobody smoked, nobody drank, nobody drove a car, nobody did any of the things that everyone did in movies.  well, a small variation, when I wandered from "straight home" after school, almost every day after school, I saw men smoke, I saw men and women drink, and I saw men and women interact in ways that nobody did in my everyday life.  it looked like fun, but I didn't know how to get a girl to do that with me any more than I knew how to get to drive a car.  but smoking I might be able to learn.  when I did some task at home really, really well, sometimes my mother gave me cinco centavos,  if I did a task superbly well, sometimes she gave me dez centavos.  neither cinco nor dez centavos amounted to a spendable amount, but they added up.  one day they had added up to enough.  I snuck off to the little news stand that sold a little of this and a little of that on the side.  I bought enough candy to bribe my sister and my brothers not to tell on me.  then I asked for two cigarettes, and a box of matches.  the man looked troubled.  "you know I can't sell these to you if they're for you."  I didn't know any such thing, but I nodded seriously.  "they're for the servants at my house," I lied.  he studied me, shrugged, and sold them to me.  I had planned right!  I had no money left.  I walked home, distributed the candy after exacting promises, then went back into the walled-away back yard.  man oh man!  I burned through nearly every damned match in that box, and I blew and I blew and I blew through the cigarettes, just like I was sure those people in the movies did, but I could not get either cigarette to light.  "here, let me show you," my little sister offered.  I suspiciously handed over the cigarettes and matches, but she had no more luck than I did.  eventually, almost out of matches, I gave up.  years later, in high school, I just about fell over when I watched guys smoke and recognized that they sucked!  I hurried over to the drugstore, bought a pack of Camels, and got free matches!    sure as hell, inhaling was the trick!  I finished my first cigarette, rolled the pack into my T-shirt sleeve, and damn near strutted home.  but back to Brasil and roughly twelve years old.  I puzzled and puzzled and puzzled over those failed cigarettes, and watched and watched and watched, and never tumbled to inhaling!  <shaking my head>  maybe it was the magic of the place.  maybe twelve-year-olds don't need to smoke, and oughta wait until it's cool.  in any case that's how it happened for me.  and the other story I meant to tell you today will take at least as long, and probably deserves its own paragraph, so there will be a part eight tomorrow.

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

195.366 - 2016 project and northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part six

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part six

(reminder:  1945-1954 is once upon a time, and these experiences were had by a boy between two-and-a-half and ten years old.)  you have met the blue-grey house, the walled-away back yard, and its hidden shed, a rickety shed.  these hardly figure in this appreciation, except to give it context.  it might also be important that if I was about ten, then my sister was about seven-and-a-half, the older of my younger brothers was about five, and my little brother was about three-and-a-half.  they all have roles in this appreciation.  we left off with me seeing the shed in a new light, so to speak, as an opportunity rather than a disappointment.  what did I see?  light and shadows, but mainly dimness.  what association did I make?  churches where I'd heard my father preach one sermon or another.  you have probably gathered that I had a strange relationship with my father.  he was seldom home, and I thought that was a good thing.  whenever he was home, he created such turmoil that it took my mother a week to soothe things out after he left.  he was my father, and in some sense I loved him, but I didn't trust him.  he had lied to me so many times, lies so stupid that they were easily revealed as lies, that I no longer accepted anything he told me except as possibly true.  he had set me up to hurt my feelings and then teased me about being a baby so often that I'd taught myself to smile with one corner of my mouth turned down - damn, that took a lot of practice! - so I could give him that smile and he wouldn't know whether I was smiling with him or being disappointed.  I had learned not to wince when he murdered Portuguese.  and I had practiced making fun of his sermons.  he had phrases that repeated from sermon to sermon, and a clever little boy could study those phrases and find a way to twist each one so it didn't quite make sense any more.  my father had certain gestures that went along with those phrases, and by re-pairing them, the gestures no longer fit, so the combination of phrase and gesture became a little silly.  he also had vocal tricks, like dropping to a stage whisper for certain phrases, or building the volume with phrase after phrase, so that when he got to the key point, he was almost shouting.  now, in the blue-grey house, I had a room of my own, on the first floor.  the rest of the family lived on the second floor.  really.  and I thought it was wonderful!  I not only had a room of my own but it was in a separate part of the house.  when I was sent to my room, or when I sent myself to my room, I would practice putting twisted phrases, gesture, and vocal tricks together and in the right order for maximum foolishness.  but I had no audience.  I wouldn't have dared put on my sermon for my father.  he had no sense of humor except when he was with other men.  but sitting there in that shed, I thought maybe I could put it on in the shed for my sister and brothers, and maybe they'd laugh.  so I arranged all the crates but one in a curved row.  the one, the empty one, I set up as the preacher's dais, in the focus of the "chairs".  then I had to go convince my sister and brothers that they wanted to come visit A Church of Our Own.  Took some doing.  my sister had been told not to go back into that part of the yard.  my brothers had peeked in from the gate and decided it was too scary.  I must have been at my persuasive best though.  pretty soon I led my sister and my brothers back into the walled-away back yard, back along the path through the taller-than-a-man weeds, back to the rickety shed, and inside it.  I helped each one to her or his seat.  My little sister had even worn a hat and carried a purse.  then I climbed onto the dais solemnly, thanked them for coming, promised them that God would bless them for being there, and began my sermon.  just as I finished the crescendo part where I wagged my finger at the sky and delivered the line that was most nearly a joke, the top of the crate collapsed.  my little brother remembers that I'd just hollered and made that gesture when I disappeared.  he screamed and jumped off his chair, and my sister and the older of my younger brothers did too.  my little brother ran for the door and they followed him.  the three of them ran for the house, inside it, and upstairs to their rooms, and never ventured into the walled-away back yard again.  me?  I climbed out of my "dais" all alone, looked around disgustedly, and figured out how to repair that damned crate.  I did, but it didn't matter.  my audience wanted nothing to do with A Church of Our Own ever again.  except to tell the story now and then.  and I learned that magic of my own takes a little more preparation than I'd thought.

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

194.366 - 2016 project and northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part five

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part five

It's probably worthwhile to remind you again of the caveats on this sequence of appreciations:  1945-1954 was once upon a time, and these appreciations come from the experiences of a boy from two-and-a-half years old to about twelve years old.  For this part, part five, the appreciation comes from the experiences of a boy between ten and twelve years of age.  the blue-grey house, the last house we lived in in Brasil, had a more or less enclosed narrow back yard separated from the main lot by an eight-foot high wall that ran all around it.  well, not all around it.  there was a gate-sized gap in the wall, near the pineapple plant.  how big a gate?  well, way bigger than boy-sized.  you could probably have led a horse through it, but two big men couldn't have walked through it at the same time.  that size.  for this boy, that walled away back yard was a spooky place.  I explored it of course, but only after peeking in several times.  whatever lived back there hid from me every time, which made me brave enough to go in.  there was no grass like a lawn, but a stubble might have been the remains of a lawn.  weeds had taken over, weeds way taller than me, maybe taller than my father.  taken over like they made a sorta jungle.  there was a hint of a path, and I used a machete to hack the path into what it should have been, like an explorer would have done.  it was cool!  I actually used a machete and did something useful to me!  the path led me to and past the shed - a rickety structure shaped more or less like a garage that no car could ever get to.  which made sense, I suppose, since we had no car.  no one in the neighborhood had a car, or any place to put one.  cars were not common in 1952, not in northeastern Brasil.  but the shed.  how rickety was the shed?  if a boy pushed on it, the walls swayed.  even a ten-year-old boy knew not to climb on that shed.  and what was in the walled in yard out past the shed?  nothing.  the spooky walled-in back yard was kind of a disappointment.  it held no captured princess, no wounded dragon, no dying knight, not even a vaqueiro or a bandido leftover from an old movie.  the only thing it held of interest besides the weeds was the shed.  the shed had two doors.  one of them was big and wide, like you might use to back a cart up to, except there was no way to get a cart into that walled-in back yard, and no way to get the cart past the weeds if you did.  it was a mystery wrapped in secrecy.  but I figured out how to get the little door, the man-sized door open.  some book I read described how to get through a locked door, and made it sound easy.  it wasn't, but I learned to do it.  which got me into the shed.  inside, the shed was festooned with cobwebs, so I had to get a stick and sweep them off things.  what things?  an old table, kind of oval-shaped.  I tried to imagine the people who would eat sitting at an oval-shaped table.  my parents maybe.  my parents and my sister and I.  but it wasn't big enough for six of us to sit around.  (I had two little brothers.)  and the shed had crates, half a dozen or so crates.  I very carefully opened one and it was empty.  what on earth would anyone store an empty crate for?  I shrugged, and guessed my parents had.  I opened another.  a gazillion books.  that at least made sense.  I browsed several.  hm.  no pictures.  no stories.  one of them was called _Interpreting the Bible_, which made sense, sorta.  my father was a missionary, he always spoke from the Bible, and he didn't speak Portuguese very well, not to my ear.  so it made sense that he'd have a book called _Interpreting the Bible_, except for two things.  why would he keep it in a crate in the shed?  and the Bible had already been interpreted.  I had a Bible in Portuguese.  well, sometimes my father seemed crazy, so maybe it did make sense.  I closed that crate back up and opened the next.  stuff.  boxes of stuff, bags of stuff, carefully wrapped stuff, loose stuff.  if I remember right, I opened and closed every damned crate out there, and could not find a thing of interest to a ten-year-old boy!  I sat on the empty crate and wondered about grownups.  did they ever do anything that made sense?  I sat there and looked around the shed.  there was not a damned thing magical about it!  spooky, yes.  magical, no.  it was a real disappointment!  wait, though.  could it be an opportunity instead?  I thought it could!  maybe the shed could be a place where I performed some magic of sorts.  maybe it could!

Monday, July 11, 2016

193.366 - 2016 project and northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part four

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part four

part four

we're about to wrap this up.  I think a part 5 lurks, but it happens at another house.  part four wraps up the blue-grey house.  remember the caveats:  1945-1954 were once upon a time, and these memories come from a child roughly from two-and-a-half years old to about twelve years old.  in particular, the blue-grey house events happen for a child from roughly ten years old to roughly twelve years old.  and there we were, six people kind of estranged from each other, in a new house, a big house, in a new-to-them neighborhood.  my father still traveled, or we assumed he did.  in any case he was gone for long stretches, then he'd come home for a few days and try to reorder everything that was working just fine, and then he was gone again, and we went back to doing things as if my mother was boss.  my mother was busy running the house, and occasionally entertaining people who spoke a language foreign to her, whom she was supposed to impress so they'd want to be more American and more Southern Baptist.  meanwhile we kids ran free to a certain extent.  ran free.  what a strange expression!  and yet to some extent we did.  we did not know the conventions of a nice neighborhood like we lived in, so we didn't know to stay home and play in our own yard.  we lived next to an empty space, that is, a space that was plenty wide enough for another house, maybe two, and actually maybe four since since it was long enough to run from the back of our back yard to the back of the back yards of the houses across the street from ours.  in other words, it was huge for kids.  no one else played in it, so we did.  not together, you understand.  well I guess my brothers played together.  they were five and sixish years younger than me, and we didn't speak the same language or inhabit the same world.  my sister, younger than me and older than they, tried to bridge the gap, which meant she ran back and forth a lot, not really part of either playing.  I explored.  there was enough rubble there to convince me something had happened - I had read stories of King Uther trying to build his castle over a dragon's lair, so every night whatever had been built during the day got knocked down.  whoa!  might a dragon live next door to us?  but try as I might, I couldn't find the secret entrance that would let out the dragon then let him back in, and we never felt any earthquakes, so probably no dragon.  one day in my exploring I discovered the remains of a wall, an outside wall, that would have enclosed most of that space.  the wall had been about three brick-widths thick.  a castle!  but no, there were no ruins of the keep.  and from the King Arthur stories, a keep prob'ly would have been bigger than that whole space.  hmpf.  what, then?  and I knew!  well, I didn't know, but I knew as well as I could without really knowing.  a warehouse!  just like on the other side of the river!  wait!  have I not mentioned the river?  oh my goodness, the river!  just past that huge playground we appropriated, an enormous river flowed.  we were in a drought, and that river still flowed.  wide enough that we could just make out the warehouses across the river, and the men running around over and beside the warehouses looked like ants.  at least to me.  wide enough, deep enough that small ocean-going ships could travel upriver and downriver and pass each other with plenty of room to spare.  it wasn't the Mississippi, but it was a big river.  I tried and tried and tried to build a raft that I could ride down the river on, but the spare wood I found was too small.  the rafts I built were not much larger than me, and capsized while I tried to get on them.  prob'ly just as well.  I don't remember small boats on that river.  tugboats pushing or pulling a string of barges, yes, but no canoes or dinghies.  apparently men were too smart for that.  or didn't believe enough in magic.

Sunday, July 10, 2016

192.366 - 2016 project and northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part three

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part three

(I am counting on you to remember my caveats:  1945-1954 was once upon a time, this northeastern Brasil comes from the reality of a child between two-and-a-half years old and approximately twelve years old.)  grownups were so ignorant!  they tried to fool me with stories of little bitty short fairies!  I knew those were pixies.  fairies and elves were as big as humans, had fought alongside them in the Norselands, where men were huge.  I wasn't stupid.  I looked for pixies under the flowers, not fairies.  I knew the elves on Christmas cards weren't even dwarves, toy dwarves maybe, like tiny dogs are called toy dogs.  grownups!  when I was, I don't know, maybe ten?  maybe even nine!  we moved into the last house we would live in in Brasil.  we didn't know that, of course, it was just another house.  except it wasn't.  my father must have gotten a promotion and a heck of a raise!  I didn't know about those either.  what I did know was that we moved into a big house - one and a half stories, a long run from the front of the house to the back of the house - with separate servants' quarters, and a mysterious walled-away back yard out past the pineapple plant.  I called it the blue-grey house, first because it was blue-grey. then because so much that happened there felt tinged by that color.  (I didn't know that my strange parents' strange marriage was already falling apart; I thought the house did it.)  it had a forbidden front yard.  that is, it had a front yard with flower gardens and traipsy little paths that one was supposed to walk in around each.  it was for grownups to visit and admire, so kids had to stay out, period.  the front yard had two tall mango trees that we were forbidden to play in or climb or anything.  the front yard was for grownups.  along the long run from the front to the back of the house, six mango trees grew, with branches that stretched out toward and into each other.  heh heh heh!  nobody told me not to climb those! and my goodness, I could climb a couple of them high enough to look down on the roof of our second story!  whoa!  I also could climb the first tree just high enough to crawl out on one of the thick branches. out to where my weight made the branch sag a little, enough to warn me not to crawl out any farther, then I could reach up and pull myself onto a similar branch from the second tree.  I had to be careful and deft, since as I transferred my weight from one to the other, the to-branch sagged and the from-branch swept up.  if I didn't hold on tight and get out of the way, I could be somersaulted out of both trees.  (guess how I learned that!)  Ta-rah!  Tarzan!  and I could similarly move from the second tree to the third.  whoa indeed!  I could do that starting at either end, but right in the middle, between the third and fourth trees counting from the front or from the back, the branches just weren't quite thick enough to make a similar transfer.  damn.  it was a problem that had to be solved.  I knew better than to trust any rope I could make from string - that's a good story too but from another house - and clothesline wouldn't bear my weight.  nope, braiding clothesline didn't make it strong enough either.  somewhere I found some old rope so thick I could just hold onto it, but it was too old.  it parted when I tested it close to the ground.  (see?  I was learning.)  whoa!  then I found a pipe!  it was about as thick as the old rope, only it wasn't old - it hadn't rusted or anything.  it was long enough that I could just get it home, carrying it over my shoulder.  ooo!  it was long enough to reach from tree to tree lying along the ground.  I tied a clothesline to the pipe down near the end and climbed into the tree then pulled the pipe up to me, then ever so carefully guided the pipe from a Y in one tree's branch to another Y in the other tree's branch.  Ta-rah!  it held!  oops!  there was a problem!  the pipe was too slick to walk on!  and I could use it like a monkey bar to get from one tree to the other, but there were no branches on the other tree that I could get to like that that would hold my weight.  heh heh heh!  I learned another trick.  if I put enough sap from the mango tree on the bottom of my feet, the pipe was no longer too slick!  (later I learned that I only needed to start with the soles of my feet dirty enough.)  I could walk out almost to the middle of the pipe holding on to skinny branches of the from-tree to help with my balance then take three quick steps across the middle of the pipe and grab (desperately) at skinny branches of the to-tree, again for balance, and walk to where I could climb onto a branch thick enough to hold me!  see?  problem solved.  I could then get from one tree to another from the front tree to the back, or from the back tree to the front!  see?  it was a magical place!

Saturday, July 9, 2016

191.366 - 2016 project and northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part two

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part two

remember, this is all happening in once upon a time, seen and heard by let's say a four-year-old boy.  so inside the boundaries of that caveat, my father knew a colonel!  the colonel had a sword and a gun that I could see, but I mustn't touch, and certainly couldn't hold.  oh crap!  you need more background!  you see, northeastern Brasil in about 1946 was much like our southwest in about 1870.  there were huge ranches, small farms, towns, villages, dirt roads.  people walked those dirt roads if they must.  farmers had horses, but not for riding.  ranchers had riding horses, and so did their employees, the vaqueiros, or cowboys.  ah!  and so did the bandidos, the bandits!  the army was active in northeastern Brasil in 1946 mainly to put down the bandidos.  into this cowboys and bandits idyll, the army and merchants had introduced trucks.  trucks used the dirt roads for commerce, and every town had a gas station for the trucks.  the army used their trucks to move large numbers of soldiers more quickly than bandidos could move their small bands.  all this happened in an old and dried out land undergoing a twenty-year-long-already drought.  (it would last another ten years, but no one knew that then.)  year after year, a new year came but the rains didn't, or they came fitfully, never enough and often in the wrong place.  people mostly lived where they were born, and poverty was worse for young people than it had been for their parents.  almost no one just walked away.  what for?  they had no sustaining stories of a better life somewhere else.  whatever the cities promised, if one could ever find a city and get to it, was more like slavery than improvement.  and where would they find water or food?  but for a little foreigner insulated from all that, northeastern Brasil in let's say 1946 was magical!  a colonel!  soldiers!  trucks in a caravan!  stories of gunfights!  a jeep!  and in the towns, pretty young women with loud colorful dresses and sensuous ways that he had never seen before!  I have warned you:  take all this with a helping of salt.  especially what follows.  I have no idea how I could know this, but it lives for me like a memory, not a dream.  the colonel and his trucks stopped out of sight of a town.  they swept out in a network that closed in on the town.  the colonel rode a white horse into the town in which a soldier or two stood in every intersection and a soldier stood on the roof of the taller buildings.  my father and I followed the colonel in a Jeep.  the colonel met with the merchants and the town officials.  I don't think he got anything but information, and probably that information was guesses.  how would the townspeople know where the bandidos camped?  or planned on raiding next?  but this may have been what mattered to my father:  the colonel introduced him to the merchants and officials.  when he came back, they would remember that he had some undeclared protection by the army.  I think there may have been a baile that night, and I think we and the colonel rode on the next day accompanied by the soldiers and the colonel's horse, of course.  eventually we heard that some of the colonel's men found a group of bandidos and there was a big gunfight until all the bandidos were dead.  I remember thinking that must be it then.  no, the colonel and his soldiers had more to do, and we trailed along with them until the colonel sent us back in a truck to wherever we lived then.  I think I slept most of the way, but that may only mean that that part of the trip was pretty humdrum after all the excitement.  but even back at home, I dreamed for weeks, maybe months, about traveling with soldiers!  it was part of the magic that northeastern Brasil was!

Friday, July 8, 2016

190.366 - 2016 project and northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part one

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

northeastern Brasil, 1945-1954, part one

take this with a grain of salt, or maybe a pound.  once upon a time, and 1945 really was once upon a time.  very few people who were grownups then exist today, and very very very few UnitedStatesian grownups then can talk about it today.  if someone were twenty in 1945 they would be ninety-one today.  I don't know anyone ninety-one or older who lived in northeastern Brasil in 1945.  I'm just saying that I've waited long enough that I can't corroborate what I remember with anyone who was grownup at the time.  but then how could he or she anyway?  there is very little shared between the way a twenty-year-old experiences the world and the way a two-and-a-half-year-old experiences the world.  you're stuck with me and how magical the world was!  I was old enough to toddle and a vast lawn was like having the world as a playground.  as I understand it, my father went to the real language school all day, the language school for missionaries.  which means, I suppose, that my mother went to the unreal language school, the one for spouses.  when my mother was about as old as I am now, she told me she never did learn the language properly.  she mispronounced words, misconjugated verbs, and never did learn the gender of nouns.  my father thought he learned it well.  meanwhile I'd learned the language the way two-and-a-half-year-olds do, by imitation.  I didn't yet know the word approximation, but I knew that's what he spoke.  so I grew up thinking I spoke the language of kids and young people around me, and maybe I did.  in that language, the world around me took shape.  there were no robins and there were no sparrows, but there were bem-ti-vi and some big scissor-tail bird that I thought was half as big as me, and was just sure it wanted to play with me.  there was an Englishman who had spent his adult life missionarying in northeastern Brasil, meaning he'd arrived before the twentieth century had.  he had a grown son who was then a missionary from the English Baptists, even though he had damn near no experience of England, and so was doubly suspect.  he was "too native" and he was English Baptist, which was better than being English anything else, but not quite right.  I think some American Baptist missionaries were there too, but they were definitely not right.  we were Southern Baptists, the real Christians.  in spite of that, I had Brasilian playmates for a while, and we laughed and ran and jumped and stomped just as if we were all real kids.  my parents were busy.  when we moved from the city out to some town where my father was the Baptist missionary, it was small enough that my folks lived out on the edge of town.  my father traveled a lot, doing whatever horrible things missionaries do, and my mother was busy with my baby sister, so I escaped as often as I could.  I made friends with several other boys who weren't allowed outside their yards, which may have piqued my curiosity.  I found my way out of town and into brush in which lived animals I'd never seen the likes of.  I found a cave and explored it, deeper and deeper.  when sunlight ran out, I stole a candle and matches, and they ran out, so I stole a flashlight - flashlights in 1945 or thereabouts were pitiful things, dim, fluttery, unreliable - and when it ran out I was really in the dark!  I remember standing there in nothing but dark and wanting to scream and run around like a lil kid, and stomping all that down.  I turned around and used my hands along the wall to walk my way back til I could see the light.  I took a deep breath and stepped back into the middle of the cave and walked toward the light.  when I got to the mouth, I stood there, half in and half out, and savored the moment.  I was no longer a lil kid.  I was a boy!  then I ran home.  tell someone?  are you kidding?  I had already learned way better than that.  but proud?  dambetcha!  I had found the cave, found my way in, then found my way back out!  could you get any more boy than that?

Thursday, July 7, 2016

189.366 - 2016 project and muddle

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

muddle

the English language has stolen words from countless languages, but one of the best thefts is muddle.  we weren't satisfied to steal it, we stole it and twisted its meaning and added meanings of our own, twisted those and wound up with the muddle it means today!  when I first ran into it, I was a child trying to understand this mysterious place grownups called "home".  the grownups were mostly UnitedStatesian Baptist missionaries in northeastern Brasil, where I lived, who made it very clear that where they lived and worked was definitely not home.  the other two accesses I had to "home" were Time magazine and the Reader's Digest.  so I may have had a distorted idea of "home".  but in one of them I ran into the word muddle, and looked it up in the dictionary.  I should probably call it the Dictionary.  it was an Unabridged Dictionary with its own wooden stand.  whenever I ran into a word I didn't know, I looked the word up in that Dictionary.  often that helped, but sometimes I would look up some word like hempsquatch, for instance, and be told that it meant a sampbiddle of froombisqutable vornadoes or a hoople of polisidereal formpfnagels. these are not helpful to a foreign child, who can only imagine the beings to whom those mean something.  but muddle wan't like that.  it had half a dozen or so meanings, and I understood each!  better than that, it was like a secret word!  it fit so many things I ran into.  the time after a school assembly was announced but before it started.  what grownups sounded like talking before an event.  my room before my mother lost her temper.  (I never found it.  prob'ly just as well.)  my family when I tried to figure out how anyone ever put us together.  the books in my "library".  what a map of all the ways I had walked home would look like.  what life felt like.  the bicycle I'd seen after a truck ran over it.  I treasured that word!  I'm not sure I ever used it out loud until long after the grownups yanked me out of northeastern Brasil and dumped me into this place called "home".  which was indeed just like Time or the Reader's Digest had described it.

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

188.366 - 2016 project and walking

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

walking

this is as in "oh, how I miss walking!"  that kind of appreciation.  my ankles hurt.  the balls of my feet hurt.  my knees sometimes hurt.  what I do now is an imitation of walking.  many of the motions are the same, but slower, and jerky.  I can push myself up into a more or less erect stance, then coax one leg and then the other to take a step.  oh, it does make me appreciate walking even like I did it it a coupla (more or less two) weeks ago, but especially walking like I did most of my life.  walking was natural and easy, it took me everywhere.  well, nearly everywhere.  I did ride my bicycle, then my scooter (a Lambretta), I rode in cars, I rode my motorcycle, then my Harley.  But mostly I walked.  or ran up stairs, or skipped down them two at a time.  mostly I walked.  it was easy and apparently thoughtless.  now it is neither, and I still walk, in the apartment, or down to the car.  I walk short distances from the car when we go some place, then I sit down.  and now and then, facing a long walk (two or three blocks) from the car to where I'm going, I balk.  at Kaiser-Permanente, I borrow one of their wheelchairs.  trust me, I really do appreciate walking.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

187.366 - 2016 project and Holly Prado

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

Holly Prado

Holly Prado shows up for a poetry reading and turns it into an Event.  she is a Presence, an embodiment of Poetry, at least a representative of the Muse.  if Holly Prado reads, she invites us to hear her as Just Another Person who happens to write poetry, but it is impossible.  she removes all the muddle from English.  she lets us feel what it is to be Holly Prado and wake up in the morning, or to lose a friend to death, or to smell a breeze in spring.  I do not mean she writes anything confessional, but personal and intimate, yes, like Emily Dickinson might if she were alive in 2016, or like Stephen Hawking might if he wrote poetry.

Monday, July 4, 2016

186.366 - 2016 project and the United States of America

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

the United States of America

yes, I do.  and I appreciate them so frustratedly!  ever since I was a school kid and read my American school books, often quickly followed by a Brasilian newspaper or by Brasilian history at school.  how was one to believe both?  in the American books (yes, we don't acknowledge that Brasilians are Americans, not even that Mexicans are), the USA is dedicated and committed to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.  how come Americans don't look happy then?  in picture after picture after picture of Americans, they look like a people who just walked out of a prayer meeting and bit into an onion.  and that's how I remembered Americans from my brief first grade visit:  sour, unhappy, cranky people who quickly put on a smile if you were identified as family, but lost it when you spoke.  "doesn't the child speak English?"  "yes, but with an accent."  "oh.  well then."  sometimes we would try again, the whole smile-and-speak thing.  yes, Americans might pursue Happiness, but they obviously didn't find it often.  and Americans invade other countries - they had to, according to Time magazine - which nearly always meant killing and people grieving.  so much for Life.  unless you meant the magazine.  but, no, they couldn't have known about cameras and slick paper back in 1776!  it was very confusing.  that left Liberty.  maybe the USA stood for Liberty.  but where?  I decided I'd have to figure that out later, when I got older.  I'd love to report to you that I did, but I didn't.  the USA may stand for Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness, but I can't see them in its actions.  nevertheless, I think the American people believe they do.  somehow that gives me hope.  maybe Happiness will show up in American faces.  maybe the commitment to Life will show up.  maybe someone will explain Liberty to me in a way that our commitment to it shows up for me.  but in any case, hurray for America!  hurray for the USA!   hurray for the red, white'n'blue!

Sunday, July 3, 2016

185.366 - 2016 project and soldiers

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

soldiers

there's just something clean about soldiers, isn't there?  we train them to kill on command, and to let nothing but being killed stop them from killing until we give the counter-command.  and damn!  they do that!  and of course, we mess it up.  we can't stand that cleanness, that simplicity.  but partly they mess it up too.  they are way more complicated than kill or be killed.  they are at just the right age so that if we hadn't trained them to be killers, they would be sex-hunters.  not that we acknowledge that.  but it's true even if we lie about it.  and they're at that strange age when they decide - I don't know how - that they need an education or that they don't need an education.  I'm not talking about the foolishness we fed them for twelve years.  if they're going to get an education, they have to unlearn that and learn what's really so.  if they're not going to get an education, then they choose to accept that foolishness as a real description of the real world.  yes, their civilian counterparts are making the same decision, but without the simplicity of kill-or-be-killed.  I guess what I mean is that that simplicity, that purity, gives them a nobility the rest of us don't share.  (maybe resenting that nobility is the reason we treat soldiers so shabbily when they become veterans.)  hail soldiers!  thank you for living like you do.  thank you for doing what you do.  thank you for being who you are.

Saturday, July 2, 2016

184.366 - 2016 project and midyear, the second

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

midyear, the second

a friend of mine claims that on leap years, which have an even number of days, there is no midyear at all except for the tiny moment of midnight between DoY 183 and DoY 184.  "No, no, no, no, no," I say to him.  "we celebrate midyear for two days on Leap Years."  he remains unconvinced and counters that "we" , whoever "we" is do not celebrate midyear at all.  "Poo," I say to him.  "my blog, my rules.  we celebrate midyear for two days on leap years."  so here it is, DoY 184, July second,  midyear the second.  rejoice!  we begin the second half of our annual trip around the sun!

Friday, July 1, 2016

183.366 - 2016 project and midyear, the first

every day in 2016, write a sentence or a paragraph or a poem that appreciates

midyear, the first

Happy July day!  Happy midyear, the first!  Tonight at midnight we complete half of a full orbit around the sun since we began this calendar year, and since I began this project.  (if this were a regular year and not a leap year, we would complete it at noon today, and there would only be one midyear day.)  no, it's not aphelion.  that's not until about a half-hour past midnight on 5 July.  we didn't design our calendar year to coordinate with astronomical events.  nope, this is just a day like any other day, except that we're about to complete half a trip around the sun.